How much time should you spend with yer boyfriend?

[bindy]

Hello all. I have another boyfriend question again simply because you are all boys. Anyway, ive been with my boyfriend for 3.5 years and we dont live together which I am fine with. But we only see each other every second day probably and only really at night. Is he just weird, or am I weird for wanting to see him more??

[Black Knight]

So you are his Tue, Thu, Sat girl then
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Where does a turn end? 'Where you can do anything with the gas you want to, where you are brave again, where your attention is free from the turn, where you are sure you can do it better next time; that's the end' - Keith Code.

[karen_moomin]

It depends if there is a future for you both and if you want to build a life together.

When me and my bloke were dating (the first year) we saw each other 3 or 4 times a week.

We have been living together for 8 months and now see each other everyday. Not necessarily quality time all the time, as we tend to do more stuff independantly, but it's nice just being a proper part of each other's lives. Before we lived together it did feel kinda part-time, but the time we spent together was quality time.

The next natural step is living together, is that not an option? How old are you both? 3 and a half years is a long time to just 'date'. Maybe you need a talk about where your relationship is heading?

A girls perspective

[Black Knight]

I met my other half Nov 5th 2003.

Spent pretty much all my time with her.

After 2 months she moved in.

2 years later I still can't get rid of her
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Where does a turn end? 'Where you can do anything with the gas you want to, where you are brave again, where your attention is free from the turn, where you are sure you can do it better next time; that's the end' - Keith Code.

[numark1]

Every other day i think is good. Can't stand it when people cling to me whoever it is, maybe thats from school though.

I also don't like it when people always check up on me.

[Hex]

For the past two years I've only seen my other half for 4 - 8 days avg per month (ok we do live a long distance apart).

So I think your doing just fine with every other day.

If you want to see him more thats fine, however if he doesnt then you have problems. Without living together seeing each other everyday can actually put a strain on the both of you as you have no time for anything else in your life.
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[Annabella]

One of my colleagues very wisely said:

"At the end of the day, you go out with people to decide if you want to spend the rest of your life with them, which basically comes down to whether you can live with them."

We're all looking for a partner to be with, and live with. It does depend on age etc; but I knew after a couple of months dating Jon that I wanted to spend more time with him. We lived a long way apart and saw each other at weekends, and occasionally during the week, but like Karen we both very much do our own things. Now we are living together, and I feel able to do more of my hobbies by myself because he's always there to come home to and vice versa.
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[DEN MONKEY]

3 minutes 45 seconds
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meh

[getyerkneedow...]

I dont spend anywhere near enough time with my boyfriend. Work, and other business agreements take up the majority of my time, and i devote what little remains to him - but i know deep down inside that i cant always put work before him.

I need to learn to give him the time and effort that he deserves.

Meeting him tonight for some drinks, then im cooking for him and we're spending the nite in together in front of the TV. Spend some quality time with each other.

[MattyB]

[msgander]

whatever you are both comfy with. THink its important to keep your friends and hobbie, ultimately living with someone you love is best because you dont feel so pressurised to spend every dying minute with them, you can do your own thing and know you are still going to be able to spend time with them.
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Always believe that your guardian angel flies a bit faster than you...............

[freckles]

Me and Rick have spent near enough every night together since we got together a year and seven months ago, neither of our parents had a problem with him staying at mine or vice versa, the only problem we have encountered has been since I moved to Bradford to go to university but even now he stays at least three night out of the week.
It's perfectly normal to want to see your other half more, just make sure you leave time for yourself!

Sam
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[colin1]

I think spending too little time together can be better than spending too much time together.

I moved in with my girlfriend quite quickly but after nearly 3 years we stopped having quality time and just had lots of moaning at each other time. Towards the end we saw each other less while in the same house, than when I was first seeing her and visiting a lot.

Leave them wanting more rather than moaning about you being messy. If you arent messy and neither is he, then it might not be a problem. I was very messy.

For my next girlfriend, I will not be moving them in, and will just see them a few times a week.

If you live with someone it can become a battle to change the other into what you want them to be rather than accepting who they are, which gets a bit silly.
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[The View Askew]

[Spiral]

Do you want to see him more or do you want him to watch the soaps with you

Seriously though its good that he and you spend at least 3-4 days a week with eachother that gives you and him time to do their own thing.

Even if you were living together if you lived in eachothers pockets day in and day out then that could spell disaster the best relationships are ones were people still have their own time to do things, well until you get kids then you can throw your life outta the window
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[Black Knight]

Its probably just me as I have a all or nothing attitude to most things in my life.

I can't really see the point of being with some casually or on a 'see how it goes basis'.

I just don't see the point. Surely you're just wasting your time if thats the case.

I knew after about 3 hours spent with my GF that she was the one for me. She's the most important thing in my life and I would die for her without hesitation.

Seeing someone casually just seems a bit pointless to me

Casual sex - now thats a differant thing entirely
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Where does a turn end? 'Where you can do anything with the gas you want to, where you are brave again, where your attention is free from the turn, where you are sure you can do it better next time; that's the end' - Keith Code.

[Deano]

dont force him to be with you if he likes his alone time by himself or with his mates.

I have the problem where I like to go fishing or do something within regards to bikes and my bird always wants to come and if i dont let let her I get it in the ear some time or another. I wouldnt mind but I do these things to relax and all she does is become a nuisance because I have to accomodate her in someway, which usually defies or takes the fun in what Im doing.

Not a surpise then that I took a shift job so I had the perfect excuse for her to not get involved with when I want to do something
But other than that Im with her pracitcally all the time, I only get to see my friends once a week or twice if im lucky. So i think its justified that I wanna get away from her at least one day a week or she just ends up getting on my tits and we end up arguing a lot.

[DrJustice]

I see mine 1-3 times a week in a 2 year relationship so have plenty of freedom
My previous girlfriend was every day 24-7 which was a bit much you take each other for granted then !
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[riichy]

[bindy]

Yes. Good advice. We did live together after a bit more than a year. We moved to another city not far away from both our parents where we were living, but I ended up leaving him in a fit of rage because he had a lot of issues to sort out that he wasnt. I moved back in with my parents and now im still living with them because of Uni degree even though im 24 nearly 25. I feel like a retard but I wouldnt be able to afford nice car/bike otherwise or get through uni. He moved back to our old city too and moved in with his mum but is about to move out with a boy because we are both not wanting to move in together, plus I cant afford. So we took a step backwards I suppose. Anyway I guess one person always wants to see the other more. Some weeks we see each other every week. I think I just want someone to annoy me and chase me around a bit.

[DEN MONKEY]